After visiting many bridal shops, trying on countless gowns, as well as looking online, I finally said, “yes to the dress.” The search was over. Or was it?
Dress Shopping
Since my sister and friends live out of state, I went dress shopping by myself. Occasionally, I would text pictures or video chat with my sister and/or a friend.
As fun as dress shopping can be, at times it left me feeling drained, confused and discouraged. It also affected my self-esteem. I had to try gowns that were 1-2 sizes bigger than my regular dress size (which is actually normal for bridal gowns). Still, I became discouraged when I tried on so many dresses that didn’t look good on me and I wondered if I’d ever find the right one. If anything, those experiences gave me a better idea of what to look for and what to avoid.
Finding “the” Dress
I just started dress shopping and had gone to only two shops before Ohio closed all non-essential stores due to the quarantine. As I began looking online, I came across a bridal shop in Indiana having a sample sale. I found this one gown that I really liked. I was eyeing it for weeks so I was excited when the store reopened. At the same time, I was hesitant to drive that far so I continued my search at nearby boutiques.
After four more stores and still not finding anything, I decided to drive to Indiana. Surprisingly, the shop had a bunch of dresses in my budget that I liked. After trying multiple gowns, I narrowed it down to two: the one I had been eyeing (and ultimately bought) and one that I was still thinking about after I already made my purchase.
Second-Guessing Myself
Maybe I was rushing myself — though the salon never made me feel rushed or pressured. I drove almost two hours to this shop determined to come home with a dress. But, was it “the” dress? On my drive home, I started overthinking and second-guessing myself.
The uneasiness of self-doubt crept in. I envisioned walking down the aisle wondering if I should have gotten the other gown.
The off-the-rack dress I bought was at least one size too big on me and needed alterations. I didn’t think of it at the time and later became concerned about the complexity of the alterations and how it would affect the overall appearance.
The other dress (a completely different style) fit well and needed minimal alterations. I was surprised by how good it looked on me. I’m not sure I had the same feeling with the dress I purchased — but it’s the one I had pretty much convinced myself I would get even before I tried it on.
Dress Regret?
I wouldn’t say it was “dress regret.” I really like my dress, but I couldn’t stop thinking of the other one which was very flattering and had more of a wow factor. A friend (whose opinion I trust) approved of my purchase, yet her initial reaction to the other gown (the one I didn’t buy) seemed to confirm that wow factor feeling.
It sucks second guessing myself and feeling anxious about whether or not I made the right choice. After sleeping on it, I felt more at ease. I contacted a seamstress and also reassured myself that accessories would help complete the look. Initially, this all made me feel better.
Love It or Hate It?
My feelings about my dress have gone back and forth. I thought that any buyer’s remorse was short-lived. After my third fitting, however, the second-guessing returned. My concern about the alterations was confirmed and it’s costing me more than I expected. Maybe it was also because the alterations were still a work in progress and not quite “there” yet. After my fourth fitting, however, I felt good about my dress again.
Maybe I put too much pressure on myself with the idea of finding “the” dress. I may have second-guessed myself at first, but now I’m glad I said yes to my dress. I chose a pretty dress and I’ll be a beautiful bride no matter what I wear. At the end of the day, marrying my best friend is what’s most important.
